Oh Autumn...My Love!

So it's that time of the year again...when life would soon start to change color...when winds would start to chill...when leaves would fall to the ground and birds would fly away, shying away from the gold times...the dark times...

This time of the year holds a certain kind of sadness to it....a certain kind of sorrow for the departed...the air reminisces about lost lovers...broken hearts...unsaid words... forgotten promises and unveiled truths... And yet there is something about this time of the year that attracts me to it...it calls on to me...the sadness that exists in the very atmosphere seems magical to me...the winds that hold the echo of what once was draw me towards them...it is this time of the year that finds me playing back all the events of my life over and over again like the reel of a favorite old movie...where every scene is lovingly remembered and yet I yearn to watch it over and over again...

This time finds me peacefully quiet...happy in the solitary confines of my mind...it is a time when long walks are enjoyed in silence...and the pages of a book become my favorite source of warmth...

To those around me I seem to be brooding over lost things...but that is not so...I lovingly reminisce over them...assuring them that they may have been lost....but they certainly have not been forgotten...and once that is done I take those reels of past store them away at the back of my mind again....ready to come back to the present and live here and now...making new memories...and learning new lessons...but only till another autumn beckons me...calls on to me to live the magic once again....to fill my heart with the love I hold for the past and to re-live what once was...for that is the joy of the lovely autumn time...

Silence...

That time...just before the walls crumble and crack and tumble down with mighty sounds of crushed hopes and unfulfilled dreams...and just before the wind gives its mighty war cry, triumphant at finally being able to penetrate those defenses that were never supposed to break, triumphant at finally being able to encompass the soul that those iron clad walls protected and being able to clutch it within its numbing fists at, gnawing at it like a hungry beast...just before the soul lets out its last piercing howl at the torment, the agony of being probed and touched and mercilessly bent and twisted and broken by unfriendly winds.

Just before that time there is a silence in the world...a few seconds of complete and utter soundlessness when the world itself is still...mourning the inexplicably cruel battle that was lost... it mourns the loss of what once was....and what could yet have been...if only the walls didn't break...if only the crack didn't widen...if only...Sigh! if only...

For just a few seconds the world stops and mourns in silence...honoring the soul that was soon to be lost forever...And then it all begins...